Tender mercies and a walk down memory lane

I was invited to speak in Sacrament Meeting on Sunday.  I was asked to talk about tender mercies. I have such a difficult time talking about things close to my heart because I can’t do so without tears.  The Lord blessed me with a tender mercy and I was able to speak without too many tears.

Here is my talk:

When we were sent into Lock down because of COVID, I was able to partake of the Sacrament each week in a “bubble” consisting of a senior couple from the area office and Sister Lucas who live in my same complex.  Each Sunday after we were blessed to renew our covenants through partaking of the Sacrament, we spent an hour or more discussing the Come Follow Me lessons, sharing thoughts and bearing testimony.  That became a spiritual feast each Sunday that I looked forward to.  Our Bubble members will always hold a special place in my heart.  

Some may say that it was a convenience that we were all in the same place at the same time with the same motivations.  To me, that was a tender mercy to be able to have and feel that spirit each week.

My father passed 22 years ago.  When planning his funeral, my mother, sister and brother thought that since I was the eldest child, I should be the speaker at the funeral representing the family.  They ask that I speak and relate experiences of my father’s life and share my testimony.  Because I cry easily, I couldn’t imagine how I would be able speak in front of the congregation to honor my father without tears.  

Before traveling to the location of the funeral, two of my sons gave me a blessing.  I was able to give that talk without the expected tears.  To me, that was a miracle and a tender mercy given to me by my Savior.

Today, I have been asked to share with you some thoughts about tender mercies.   I have gathered most of my thoughts from a conference address given in April 2005 by Elder David A Bednar titled: The Tender Mercies of the Lord.

Because Elder Bednar explains tender mercies in such a clear and understandable way, I hope that you won’t mind if I read a lot from this conference address.  

First, I think we must understand what are tender mercies?  

Elder Bednar says:  “The Lord’s tender mercies are the very personal and individualized blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindnesses, consolation, support, and spiritual gifts which we receive from and because of and through the Lord Jesus Christ. 

Recall how the Savior instructed His Apostles that He would not leave them comfortless. Not only would He send “another Comforter,” even the Holy Ghost, but the Savior said that He would come to them.   Let me suggest that one of the ways whereby the Savior comes to each of us is through His abundant and tender mercies. For instance, as you and I face challenges and tests in our lives, the gift of faith and an appropriate sense of personal confidence that reaches beyond our own capacity are two examples of the tender mercies of the Lord. Repentance and forgiveness of sins and peace of conscience are examples of the tender mercies of the Lord. And the persistence and the fortitude that enable us to press forward with cheerfulness through physical limitations and spiritual difficulties are examples of the tender mercies of the Lord.”

Please for a few seconds, think about a time that you have received a tender mercy from our Savior.

When I went to serve my first mission in NYC, I took my car.  My brother drove cross country with me and then flew home.  Everyone thought I was crazy and that I would be too scared to drive in that place.  I was scared but one day I had to go to a location that I couldn’t take the subway or walk.  I just decided that I would do it.  The Lord gave me the courage and “personal confidence” that I needed.  That was a tender mercy.

I have shared this experience with you before but because it has meant so much to me, I want to share it again.  The day my husband passed, I had stepped from the room for no more than 3 minutes.  When I returned, I sat on the edge of the bed, took his hand, and realized that he had left me while I was out of the room.  As I sat there, I just couldn’t imagine my life without him.  What would I now do?  How would I carry on?  I prayed and asked for help from the Lord.  As I sat there pondering, holding my husband’s hand, I a felt warm, comforting spirit surround me.  I felt at peace.  I knew that my husband was in a better, pain free place and that he would be waiting for me.  I was given courage to move forward.  I have never felt such love as I felt at that moment.  What a tender mercy given to me by a loving Savior in a time that I most needed it.

Again from Elder Bednar:  “Some individuals who hear or read this message erroneously may discount or dismiss in their personal lives the availability of the tender mercies of the Lord, believing that “I certainly am not one who has been or ever will be chosen.” We may falsely think that such blessings and gifts are reserved for other people who appear to be more righteous or who serve in visible Church callings. I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are available to all of us and that the Redeemer of Israel is eager to bestow such gifts upon us.

To be or to become chosen is not an exclusive status conferred upon us. Rather, you and I ultimately determine if we are chosen. 

God does not have a list of favorites to which we must hope our names will someday be added. He does not limit “the chosen” to a restricted few. Rather, it is our hearts and our aspirations and our obedience which definitively determine whether we are counted as one of God’s chosen.  

As I indicated earlier, the Lord’s tender mercies do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Faithfulness, obedience, and humility invite tender mercies into our lives, and it is often the Lord’s timing that enables us to recognize and treasure these important blessings.”

When I first began to think about the message I wanted to share with you today, I didn’t really think about the tender mercies that are a part of my daily life.  But I testify to you that as I look and stay aware, I see and feel the hand of the Lord in my daily activities.  Recognizing that fact is a tender mercy in and of itself.  

Elder Bednar ends his conference address with these words which I will read from his talk but which are coming also from my heart.

“I know that He lives and that His tender mercies are available to all of us. Each of us can have eyes to see clearly and ears to hear distinctly the tender mercies of the Lord as they strengthen and assist us in these latter days. May our hearts always be filled with gratitude for His abundant and tender mercies.”

I am filled with gratitude for my Savior. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ,  Amen.  

I would invite you to read Elder Bednar’s talk.  It will be worth your time:

A week ago I received word that one of the missionaries that I had grown to love (I love every missionary I have served with) in my time in New York New York South Mission, Sister Kassidy Krause now Kassidy Staheli, had passed away due to complications with pregnancy.  In looking through my pictures and memories to share with her family and friends at her memorial, I had the opportunity for a walk down memory lane.

I was blessed to serve with Kassidy in New York City. My apartment was next-door to the chapel where our Mission Office was located so I frequently got to see her when she would come to the Mission Office. She was such a delight. She brought joy and laughter to everyone but I also had the privilege of knowing her spirit which was as beautiful as she was. She was a loving, compassionate, tender person who thought of others and loved everyone. Her goal in life was to make people happy and she excelled at that.

Sister Krause and me trying on hats at a street vendor by the subway
station entrance near my apartment in Rego Park, Queens

Being able to serve, to love each missionary, and to grow in the Gospel has so blessed my life.  I hope that you don’t mind that I share these memories with you.

New York New York South missionaries

Dinner in my apartment.

Fire Island Lighthouse - A favorite destination and get-a-way

Freedom Tower from the Brooklyn Bridge

I lived next door to the Long Island Railroad tracks.  There was a Chapel between
my apartment and the tracks.  I liked to go to the bridge crossing the tracks
and look into Manhattan.  This was a particularly beautiful sunset with the
skyline in the distance and a train on the tracks in the bottom right corner of the picture.

No words needed to describe this sight!!

I was trying out for a role on Broadway.   Really, I went to zone conference
looking like this to convince the missionaries to get their influenza vaccinations.
I told them that if they got the flu, they would look like this and would feel as
if they had been hit by the Long Island Express.

Senior missionaries – Family Home Evening at my apartment and
working in the kitchen preparing lunch for a zone conference

This has been another busy week.  Been to dentist and doctor’s office visits, calls and texts, and the usual daily chores that need to be done to keep life going.  

Pic of pukeko birds from my car while waiting to get on the motorway

Thursdays we have a Zoom senior sister study group

Managed my daily beach walks.  Felt a bit like the mailman walking his/her route through rain, snow, sleet, wind, etc.  No snow nor sleet but plenty of rain, fog and wind. I love it!!!

It was really more foggy than appears in this video.

You couldn’t see Rangitoto Island at all

Sister Lucas made this video and sent it to me.

I kept moving to stay out of her screen shot

Beach finds.  Anyone know what the yellowish orange
bumpy thing is?  Animal or vegetable?

It is impossible to find “authentic” Mexican food here.  I went to
Martha’s Backyard which is an American import store.  I found this masa
and made my own tortillas.  Lacking a press, I used a saucepan to smash the dough.

Had chicken tacos and dessert was tortilla with cinnamon and sugar.

Monday evening we had a FHE for the senior missionaries in our mission.  We had chili, corn bread and yummy desserts.  We chatted and shared thoughts and ideas about how to make our mission a better place and to work with the younger missionaries to teach them how to better clean their flats and to be responsible and accountable.  

 I hope that you have a good week ahead.  Look for the tender mercies in your daily life.  I am grateful for the presence of the Lord in my life.

I love my Savior.

I love you my family and friends.

Understanding justice and mercy.

This has been another busy week.  I have been to doctor and dental appointments 5 of the seven days and I helped 2 missionaries get COVID testing and physical examinations in preparation to return to their homelands.  I am not complaining.  I love being with the missionaries.  I know that you must grow weary of my repetition but…

On a couple of days, I had morning and afternoon appointments so with driving time, waiting time, etc, I spent a lot of time sitting.  Good thing I get my beach walks.

As I was waiting at a stop light, I noticed this pohutukawa tree and its huge air roots

Of course there are the usual “chores” that need to be done. I did manage laundry, a little cleaning and grocery shopping.

I went to dinner on Thursday evening with Sister Lucas and Elder and Sister Burton who are in the office.  Great evening.  I splurged (calorically) and had fish and chips and then ice cream at Movenpick’s.  I was so caught up in the pleasure of the company and food that I neglected to get pictures.  Next time.

Saturday evening I was invited for cake and ice cream to celebrate the birthday of my friend, Elder Carter Mayberry who is the area medical advisor.  His wife made the most delicious dark chocolate cake! With the others invited, I played games and had a delightful time.

    

This week as I studied the Come Follow Me chapters in the Book of Mormon, I again received a confirmation of my testimony that Jesus Christ is our Savior.  I am grateful for the Plan of Salvation and my opportunity to come to this earth to gain a physical body and to experience this mortal life.  I am grateful for the mercy of God and for the Savior who atoned for my sins providing a way for me to return to God’s presence.  

Sometimes it is difficult to fully comprehend all of the intricacies of the Gospel, yet it is so simple.  Justice and mercy, for example, can be difficult to reconcile.

In our Sunday Gospel Doctrine class, the teacher referred to a conference address given by Elder Boyd K Packer in April 1997 titled The Mediator.  This speech makes understanding justice and mercy with Jesus Christ as the mediator so beautiful.  I would invite you to read it.

Our instructor told of a video based on Elder Packer’s speech.   I watched it when I returned to my flat.  The technology is not as good as the videos we have today, but the message is one of importance.

Here is a quote from Elder Packer’s speech that I like and find comforting:

“There is a Redeemer, a Mediator, who stands both willing and able to appease the demands of justice and extend mercy to those who are penitent, for “He offereth himself a sacrifice for sin, to answer the ends of the law, unto all those who have a broken heart and a contrite spirit; and unto none else can the ends of the law be answered.” (2 Ne. 2:7.) 

Already He has accomplished the redemption of all mankind from mortal death; resurrection is extended to all without condition. 

He also makes possible redemption from the second death, which is the spiritual death, which is separation from the presence of our Heavenly Father. This redemption can come only to those who are clean, for no unclean thing can dwell in the presence of God. 

If justice decrees that we are not eligible because of our transgression, mercy provides a probation, a penitence, a preparation to enter in.” 

I know that my Savior lives and that He loves us.  He wants us to be happy and has made a way for us to achieve that state of happiness.

I encourage you to read the entire talk by Elder Packer.

On Monday I went to the office to meet with one of the sisters returning to her home in Tonga.  I wanted a goodbye hug.  What a bitter sweet opportunity to know these wonderful young people; sweet in knowing and feeling their spirits and bitter in telling them goodbye.

Sister Taulanga going home to Tonga

Sister Hall went home last week

The office is a busy place on Mondays which is
the missionaries Preparation Day (Day “off” for play and shopping)

Of course, I’ve had my daily dose of vitamin sea. 

On Tuesday the tide was out so far that we could walk around 3 outcroppings onto beaches we have never walked before.

We walked around one outcropping to see this layered shell covered sandstone wall

Wednesday morning pink sky

I like this big shell stuck on the rock

Today, the tide was so high that we had to walk along the street for several blocks before going down to the portion of the beach that wasn’t buried in water.  

Sister Lucas

It has been raining a lot this week so the flowers and trees are beginning to blossom.

There is something about a rock wall…..

Monday afternoon when I went to the office, I walked through the reserve.  I haven’t walked there for a while.  Things are beginning to green up a bit in the reserve now.

Banana tree and fruit

Tree ferns and new fronds

Looking down from the path into the greenery

Pukeko greeting me from the foot path

As I sat in a doctor’s waiting room, I noticed the dress this lady wore.  It took me
back to my East High School days when Kay was Principal.  I would have been right
in style wearing  this leopard print outfit.  I would have been an East High Leopard in style!!!

I know that the Savior lives and that He loves each of us.  We often don’t know why or understand the things that we are called to endure but it is part of a greater plan.  Our trials give us opportunity to grow in faith and humility.  

May the Lord bless each of you with the things that will help you to grow closer to the Lord.

I love my Savior.

I love you my family and friends.